The Silent Flower
The wind grew cold as the sun begin to set; the only sound was of the fallen leaves dancing around the streets as the moon shined on them. It was peaceful, the perfect time to read a book with a cup of warm tea in your hand. Lilly wanted to speak but knew all too well she couldn do it in front of others quite yet. She wonders what her voice would sound like, but was afraid to know, its already been two years since her body forced herself to shut down and become mute. So why stop now? There was a reason she became mute, but what was it?
As I sat at the end of my bed softly swaying my feet the sound of people yelling caused my mind to shut down in panic mode. Getting up tiptoeing myself towards the noise I sat in the hallway far enough so they wouldn see me but close enough so I could hear.
”What do you mean they haven told her!? She has the right to know that man- ” The woman spoke in a loud whisper. ”They said it was for the best they didn want to bring up any memorys ” The man sighed, trying to calm down his wife. ”Come on its getting late, lets go to bed. We don want to wake up Lilly ” he sighed, softly pushing her to their bedroom.
My heart was thumping with pure fear, there was only one man who could make me feel like this…was it him they were talking about? It had to be…The one who…
I ran upstairs, hiding myself in the bathroom locking me in with my thoughts. I lie on the floor, unable to move my trembling body. Every closed scar ache as it remembered the torture it went though as if it was still happening. I wish they would have killed me, letting me leave this world with my family. I can go through this anymore, why did it have to me that survived. I can get it out, its like they entered my thoughts ready for war. I try to block it out, block out the feeling of him or the sinister smile when he saw me covered in blood, like his smiles hid knives. I would have gladly embraced death if it meant getting away from him.
I tried, tried to escape this torcher, hoping the world could soon have enough of me, letting me go. My heart started to burn as though my body was on fire, as my vision quickly grew blurry tears surrounding every crevice. It was as if my brain shut down letting me be controlled like a puppet.
The way my fingernails scraped my wrists, skin latching onto to them somehow made me feel better. Like the pain took my mind somewhere peaceful. Why does the thought of living sounds like something so dreadful,
like something you wish didn have to happen. Shouldn I want to live? To experience what its like to be a true teenager? Or was it just me, and everyone else just has perfect lives.
As the sound of peoples footsteps echoed though out the house made my body Panic, my mind becoming dizzy as my limbs felt as though they didn have any energy to move. I looked down at my hands puddle of blood surrounding my arms and nails. Creating a puddle on the floor. But why was there so much? Was I missing something? It didn hurt when I….so why? *Knock* *Knock* ”Hey, Lilly you, ok?…LILLY! ” Madison panicked voice laced with worry. Her hands trying to wiggle the doorknob open, the other rapidly knocking. ”GO GRAB THE KEY ”
But I could barely hear a sound. Or anything that came next. Then the last thing I could feel was of the door being pushed open as I lost conciseness. But even then, I felt happy as I let out a sigh of relief hoping it was my last.
”OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD HELP CALL 911! ” Madison Cried out as she picks Lilly up bridal style out of the bathroom rushing her downstairs. The loud sound of sirens echoed down the street, leaving everyone curious. Once Lilly was in the ambulance everyones full focus was on her. Trying to keep her alive. ”Get the stitches ready, she punctured blood vein ” One called out to the other as they made their way to the hospital.
I opened my eyes, ears greeted with the sound of beeping alarms. Sadly, not very pleasant, my whole body was sore and exhausted like heavy weights covering me like a blanket. As I remembered all the past events, I wasn at all surprised I was back at the hospital. When I looked down at my wrists, I saw the stitches covered with a white wrap that went up to my elbows. Not a single person was in the room, though it was refreshing I did wish I had something to occupy myself with. The windows to the room were closed off, not letting me get a peek through the tightly closed blinds. I wanted to talk about it, to tell whoever I could about the thoughts that ran through my mind. Dang it, I wanted to scream and let out any bottled-up fellings I had left or yell for help. Finally telling the world that I wasn okay like they wanted me to be. But all I could say was ”Im fine ” or that I was okay. Its hard when you constantly feel unwanted or unlovable. Even by the people you love most in this world. Its hard to forget about everything if its written all over your body, like invisible tattoos that only you can see.
”Hurting someone can be as easy as throwing a stone in the sea. But do you know how deep that stone can go? ”
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