Then Hert came and grabbed her by the shoulder.
At the vicious force, Tessa screamed out loud, her fingernails scraping the wall.
She was terrified that she might get dragged back.

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“N, no, no, no! Let go, please!”

It had always been like that.

Tessa fled to the corner, then was caught by a strong hand and dragged back.
And what followed was a fierce strike of the hand.

But this time, she was not dragged away and the hand did not hit her.
His hand fell off as soon as Tessa screamed at him.

Thanks to that, Tessa tried to turn her back impulsively for a very brief moment, and then she lowered her head again at the sound of the voice that had lowered in volume heavily.

“…Are you afraid of me?”

Hert looked down at the woman in front of him.
Terrified, her face was buried as she wept like a child.
He instinctively knew he had to stop at this point, but an unknown rage began to engulf him again.

How could you do this?

It’s absurd to act like this when you’re a traitor.

As Tessa shoved him away and ran into the corner, Hert felt half out of his mind.
His senses went cold.
But, on the other hand, he felt his chest getting hot, tingling.

Damn it. Hert clenched his hands into fists and gritted his teeth tightly.

Then, he crouched down and stared at Tessa, who tried to retreat further into the corner as much as possible.
His whole body was filled with a sense of betrayal.

Hert couldn’t stand it and opened his mouth as if accusing her.

“Tell me, do you hate me so much that it gives you goosebumps when I touch you? So are you doing this to me right now? Huh?”

“Hiic, for, forgive, hic, hiic…”

However, Hert’s words could not reach Tessa, who was crying and full of panic.
Hert looked down at Tessa for a moment, then couldn’t contain his anger.
He kicked the furniture near him. Crash! The objects on the furniture were all flung to the floor at once, causing a commotion.

“F*ck!”

Did he come back alive from that hell just to see that kind of thing?

Tessa was still weeping and trembling, and Hert felt so detestable.
She sold him and took this place, why would she pretend to be a victim now? Anyone who saw them would think that it was Hert who betrayed the other rather than vice versa.

What annoyed him the most is…

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The silhouette of the girl he knew was seldom seen.

Hert, unable to touch Tessa at all, muttered to himself the words he had endured.

“…You are such a cruel b*tch.”

With those words, Hert slammed the door so hard that it almost fell off after he disappeared.

“……”

Only after a quiet silence entered the room did Tessa gradually stop crying.
But tears continued to flow from the corners of her eyes.

Wiping the tears streaming down the back of her hand and the hem of her robe, Tessa felt the unbearable misery once more.

‘I want to die, as expected I’m…’

Now she has really been abandoned by Hert as well.
Tessa curled into herself and sniffed.
It felt like nothing was left.
A bitter regret followed.

She shouldn’t have resisted.
Why would this body tell him no? She didn’t even have the right to do that.
Just be patient and endure.

Tessa couldn’t forget the words Hert had told her.

Traitor, cruel b*tch.

There was nothing wrong with what he said.

Pushed to the limit, Tessa couldn’t stand the rising guilt and the sense of shame and began to lose her consciousness.
Her vision gradually blurred and the ceiling swirled above her.
Then, darkness engulfed her.

Tessa wanted to stay like this and disappear from the world.

From that day on, she always had felt this way.

 

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2.
Sin and Punishment

‘So naive.’

The orphanage director was organizing his books with a quill made from a colorful peacock feather.
The old woman’s gaze had been fixed on the ledger ever since.

Tessa realized that was dreaming of that day

A day when everything became drenched in mud.

She couldn’t do anything and she was powerless herself.

As if to prove it, Tessa in the dream was trembling terribly, her face blue.

‘How…’

‘How could this be? Oh God, that’s unfortunate.’

Tessa’s breath was suffocated by the shameless director’s lack of guilt.
She was so shocked that she couldn’t even speak properly.
At Tessa, the director smiled brightly? With a big smile.

‘Why do you have that face? You are the one who decided this.’

‘Haven’t you read the contract?’

‘This, this is, not, fair…….’

‘You stupid girl.
You must have signed a contract you can’t even read.’

The director’s cynical muttering could be heard loud and clear.

The low pitch.
The lilting tone.
Laughter leaking from between the teeth and bright red lips that drew an arc.
Hazel-colored eyes that were like looking at her like she was livestock, and wrinkled eyes.

Tessa could never forget that day.
There was no way she could ever forget it in the first place.

‘Why, why… why…’

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‘Do you resent me? Blame your stupidity more than me.’

All of a sudden, Tessa noticed that, behind the director’s face, which was slowly moving away, her surroundings became dyed with darkness.
Don’t go, don’t go! She reached out to grab the director, but as usual, it was futile.
Again, Tessa was left alone in the darkness.

After a while, a familiar place in the distance could be seen slowly appearing within the shadows, and she saw it approaching.

The place where Tessa had been living for a long time, made by repairing the old church.
Fitzgerald Orphanage, where the vines that bloomed profusely on the red bricks were beautiful.

It was where Tessa and Hert grew up together.

‘Here it is again.’

Tessa stood up with her bare feet and watched the children roaming the orphanage.
It was a nightmare, she didn’t know how many times she had repeated.
All of a sudden, carefree faces and light-hearted laughter tickled her ears.
And among them were two children who caught Tessa’s attention.

A girl with wavy ginger hair tied high and a boy with scars on his face.

The girl reached out her hand to the boy who had fallen to the ground, pulling him up.

‘My name is Tessa.
You?’

‘…Hert.’

‘That’s a cool name!’

She could see the boy bowing his head at the girl’s cheerful smile.
The boy then said with a languid voice.

‘…You can call me Her.’

With those words, the two children disappeared into darkness, and Tessa burst into tears.
An ordinary first meeting.
The relationship between the two began as Tessa helped Hert, who could not easily adjust to the orphanage right away, one step behind the other children.

‘No, stop.
I don’t want to see it!’

Tessa covered her face with her hands and crouched down.

‘It’ll never be the same…’

In the orphanage, Hert and Tessa were always together wherever they went.
Where Tessa was, there was Hert, and where Hert was, there was Tessa.
There wasn’t really any reason.
They were together just because they were most comfortable with each other.
Looking back, there have never been happier days.

Tessa thought that this happiness would last a long time.
They had nothing at that time, but they thought that things would get better little by little.
In the future, the day will surely come when they could laugh as much as they could and make each other’s dreams come true.

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It was a dream that could have come true, but she didn’t know it at the time.

One mere choice would change both of their lives completely.

Tessa couldn’t hold back the tears as she knew the future brought by her ignorance and naivety.

‘I heard you called me.’

That winter, there was a severe drought, and everyone was hungry.
The Fitzgerald Orphanage, which operated through donations from the people, was also suffering from financial difficulties.
At the time, Tessa became anxious and nervous at the same time when the director, whom she had never seen before, called her.

Until now, orphanages encouraged children to become independent when they reached a certain age, and that year Tessa and Hert were the oldest among orphanage students.
They were scheduled to become independent the following spring, but the situation could change at any time.

Tessa was afraid of being kicked out in the middle of winter.

And her prediction was half right and half wrong.

‘Tessa, you’ve got a good spot.’

Upon arriving at the director’s office, a broker who was talking to the director offered Tessa a job.

The Baron, who was supporting the orphanage, was looking for a maid for his sick daughter for when she’d be sent to the Royal capital.
Why not try it? The director said that the Baroness wanted a maid with ginger hair just like her.
They even said they would accept Hert as an apprentice knight of the clan once Tessa became the young lady’s maid.

It was an outrageous opportunity for the little orphan girl.
In addition, the director praised Tessa, saying that she would arrange a good job for her because she had listened to her.

‘I’m telling you, this is a rare opportunity.
You have to be independent next spring anyway, so why not think about it?’

When she said that Tessa could get a lot of money, Tessa didn’t give much thought.
Although Hert occasionally nagged her and told her to be careful, Tessa felt that she should not miss this opportunity.
What’s good is good.
She said that, above all else, they would accept him as an apprentice knight, not only her would have a better future, but also Hert.

Hert dreamed of becoming a knight since he was a child.
Tessa wanted to help Hert achieve his dreams.
Tessa also believed in his sword skills.
Although he was only seventeen, Hert handled the sword better than most adults.
He was a talented person who could quickly become a knight if he received proper instruction.

Tessa accepted the offer.
For Hert.

The broker gave her two documents and told her to stamp them with her thumbprint.
Of course, Tessa, who had never been properly educated, was of course blind, and no matter how hard she looked, she couldn’t tell what was written on the papers.
The only people around her who could read were the director and some caretakers.

The director said that it was a formality and that there was no need to worry too much about the documents.
Tessa signed the paperwork without much doubt, and the broker left with a grin, urging her to keep it a secret from others.
The director also had the sweetest smile she had ever seen and whispered that she did well.

It must also be kept secret from Hert.
It was questionable, but the director simply said it because it was a matter involving the nobles.

Looking back now, it was an absurdly stupid naivety.

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